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“Julia certainly looks scary” – said the deep fake Kim Kardashian, pointing to the satellite map. “Get yourselves ready for your first ever phytoplankton hurricane. And a category 6 for that matter!”
“That’s right” said the Trump deep fake. “For those of you who already lived through Elvira, Walter and Fiona, you know the drill: run for cover. These storms are not what they used to be. If you think you can just board up your windows and watch movies in your basement, you may be pushing your luck. Not everyone has the type of bunker that I have, and that’s the sad truth. It’s a really strong, really safe bunker, I spent a lot of money on it. A lot of money, it was very, very expensive.”
“Meanwhile scientists warn that as much as 1 million marine species may have gone extinct in the past 5 months”, said Kim. “Be sure to watch our special program about all the things that have gone extinct from our lives: from sushi to beach holidays, fishing to crab cakes. Will they ever come back? See you right after these messages. You’re watching The Line.”
The Australia-sized monster storm made its way slowly towards the East Coast. Like its predecessors, it was in no hurry. Although hurricanes had over the years become more powerful, they had also become more sluggish: often stalling over a Caribbean island for days, until there was nothing left standing. Other times, slowing down right after they had made landfall. This allowed them to have one foot in the ocean, their energy source, and one on land – where they brought devastating floods and maximum coastal surge. Hurricanes had become longer events that dragged on for 10 days or more. The home and property insurance industries had largely been wiped out, following a series of category 6 storms one right after the other a couple of years ago. It had become known as the Summer of The Apocalypse, leading to war-level fatalities and the permanent displacement of tens of millions. Trillions of dollars’ worth of government assistance still supported the largest internal population shift in the world – it was second only to the influx of 30 million refugees into India, when 15% of Bangladesh’s land surface area became permanently lost due to flooding and storm surges. As the boundaries between land and sea were constantly being re-drawn, humans were caught in the crossfire.
George is an author, researcher, podcast host, chemist, molecular biologist and food scientist. You can follow him on Twitter @99blackbaloons , listen to his Spotify podcast George reads George, sign up for blog alerts below, or enjoy his books